Turning the Page

6 years ago, when high school was finally over, I chopped off my hair, accepted my diploma and drove 350 miles in my first car to my new home. I brought with me the "important" things from my bedroom as well as some new goodies, like a set of personalized Care Bear bath towels, a blender "for smoothies," and lots of gift cards to use in the life of Ashland Oregon.

I gently held the gems of my experiences: love, trust and friendship. "This above all, to your own self be true, be your own closest friend and be gentle with you," is the quote that has held my hand through every transition since wandering from under the wing of my mother. With those first steps out into the world I was holding onto the idea that miracles are everyday occurrences, all I had to do was look for them. The book Small Miracles proved to be a reliable friend to turn to when in need of reassurance.

It was amazing to me how easily and smoothly I transitioned into my new life. There was heartache and homesickness, especially for my incredible friends and the family I grew up with but I soon developed an Oregon family as well. I met some amazing people who have certainly helped shape my views on life. I discovered the incredible oceanic depths of love from the constant rolling waves to the deepest caverns and crevices where it waits quietly to be found. I plan to know some of those people forever and others I will hold in my heart as part of our incredible experiences together.

In preparing for college I took and passed basic tests, gracefully skipped out of others and was awarded scholarships. I was embraced warmly by a community of preschool children and their parents as well as an administration who took me under their wing and encouraged me to use all my amazing talents. I came to grow close to family I'd missed when living in California and learned what the love of a father is like through my grandpa. Eventually I also felt safe enough to reach out to my own dad and reconnect with him. I'm learning how to relate to each member of my family as a person, an important person in my life, not by my choosing but by the amazing gift of an incredibly loving family.

I mapped my own way through school, across town and into the hearts of new friends. Becoming a part of student government and getting involved with theater led me to some amazing experiences! I found my passion for creativity, a love for spontaneity and allowed myself to open with flexibility to each moment and let it come to it's fullest potential. Learning to free myself and let go through snowboarding with hardcore boarders, trying out for a talent show but helping run it instead and coming to deeply appreciate the incredible passion of a musician, have all been strengthening to my sense of being in this life.

It's so wonderful to look back and see the people I shared all these experiences with, especially those who are still with me today, even if hundreds of miles away! This life has been full of gifts and I believe now more than ever if I open my heart and mind with love and acceptance, the world has amazing things to offer. I am so grateful for where I am, who I am, and where I'm going. Some days I find myself bubbling over with love and want so much to figure out how to share it with everyone! I know I have so much ahead of me and I just had to stop and embrace this day with gratitude, love and an offering of my own presence, for whatever that's worth, to the greater soul of existence.