Living with the community has been such an emotionally and spiritually amazing conflict of my heart and values. There are some deeply provocative considerations which contradict things I have rooted into my belief system that they encourage me to accept. And somehow, amazingly, I am able to find understanding and truth in what they say. Am I being naive? narrow-minded? ignorant? Or is everyone else on this planet truly lost? What a harsh reality to live in, being asked to consider that things I've been brought up believing are actually under the power of something dark and persuasive to keep me from fulfilling my true purpose in this life. I'm so grateful for the opportunity to have this experience because I'm discovering so many deep seeded struggles I'd like to overcome in order to be a better person. I've become aware that it's a life long process of discovery, humility, and neediness of genuine friends and absolute forgiveness and love. I've had some very humbling experiences in the last couple days with a couple of the brothers leading me to recognize that having true, merciful friends is one of the most rewarding ways to learn to love (myself and others.) I'm finding the struggle to be so incredible as I continue learning what I'm made of and considering who I want to become. I don't know that I could go through this process in the world without the grace of this community of people who strive daily to overcome all their iniquities and be the light they were created to be. They have amazing forgiveness, experience, ability to talk openly and hear each other. The respect, support and true friendship is unbelievable. I'm so grateful to be living with them right now.
I had SUCH an amazing time with them in Woodford too. I was so engaged in the process of learning about myself, I may as well have been making 600 chicken skewers a day for masses of people on the moon instead of at a huge folk festival. I did go to a few fun performances and talks but I was much more interested in getting muddy elbow deep in the spiritual garden of my soul. (I loved Rivkah saying, "You really wear your heart on your elbow.") There was much conflict of perspectives and understanding and I was over-filled daily with rich soul food. I really reveled in the experience of speaking my heart to new (and true) friends who helped me sort out the swirl of questions I didn't even realize I had. Amazing how much it helps to open up and express what I'm experiencing to work through it. We stayed up late working hard and woke up early in the immediate heat of summer to begin again. It was fascinating to watch the constant flow of fairy jizz fanatics flow down the row of stalls full of earthy new age materialism. The new year fire show was fun to watch and the 3 minute silence in honor of those lost was a powerful experience especially as the bell gonged to break the silence and every molecule of the atmosphere from the top of the grassy hillside vibrated with the eruption of enthusiastic cheering. I saw some friends from my travels and lived off our amazing green drink made on the farm down south. They even had tango at the festival! It was a very dynamic and diverse experience of people, music, food, lessons and heart. I love how such simple tasks can bring two open hearted people so close. I really enjoyed working with Rivkah, Natzar, Elahav, Havah, Sehkel, Simchah, Malilah, Anivah, Joseph, Shemuel, Ohevi and alongside the rest even if we only crossed paths briefly in our busy-ness. (Their names are Hebrew and I'm not positive on all the spellings.)
I find the contrast of the trips up to Woodford and back home to the mountains amazing. It was a comedy of a trip up (literally, while listening to Bill Cosby, Dane Cook and another I don't remember) where I discovered at a petrol station that I'm literally on my last legs financially (though I'm still stable, loved ones, thank you!) and encountered unbelievable names of roads and towns (like "The Clump Rd." and Wee Waa and Coonabarabran-which my rideshare dubbed "aboriginal cereal") and found out that some Australians call redheads "'rangas" (short for orangutan!) and actually saw the word "Crickey!" used on a billboard. Then the tragedy of the ride home, deep in my emotions contemplating what life really is meant to be, sleeping on the shoulders of two girls I've fallen in deep friendship with and have to say goodbye to, getting lost at Byron Bay while looking at giant metre long guaunas, passing up opportunities to swim in the gorgeous waves of the pacific to spend time twisted up in my heart and mind, and eating as much junk, sugar and oily fats as possible because it's a once a year experience for them- bleh! But of course there's much to learn from all experiences and if it weren't for the negatives, which really clarify the positives, how would we grow in life?
We made it home safely after a jostling 24 hour period of travel and slept most of the next day. It was wonderful to come "home" where I was welcomed happily along with everyone else. There were banners, signs and gift baskets filled with fresh baked cookies, fruit, goodies from the market, fizzy juice and cards and balloons. What wonderful friendship and love they have to offer and share. The house was filled with more baskets overflowing with delicious summer fruits: cherries, grapes, mangos, apricots, peaches and nectarines. And now we're back to work in the cafe and continuing to work on our hearts. I miss the people from the farm though. Hopefully we see them soon, we might have a tribal gathering next weekend. Which will push Sarah's baby's dedication back again but that's okay, it just gives me more time to finish my knitted basket!
~*~*~*~
Yeesh! It's soo hot and it's only 7am! I guess it doesn't help that I went for an unplanned run followed by speed walking all the way to the train station. Halfway to the station I realized I forgot to leave the yummy fudge brownies I had for my amazingly generous friend Jock who put me up last night. It was actually a blessing in disguise because I'd missed my turn on the way to the station, so going back I was able to see that. I set my backpack just behind someone's front wall and ran the two blocks up the hill with his treats and then sprinted back to my bag. Oh the fun adventure brings! Anyway, I'm hoping on an early train because we're having a tribal gathering today!!
^Or at least that's what I thought! It was actually a "push" with all hands on deck to help the people at the woolshed get ready for their opening day. It was hard, rewarding work. Great to see some good friends and make some amazing progress physically and emotionally. I also successfully collected a grand total of 33 mossie bites!! Ahhhhhh!!!
This weekend I met Kerry and her wonderful girlfriends at the Sydney Olympic Park to watch the Australia Open. I didn't really know much about tennis on the professional level until we stayed at her house for the cotton harvest and she watched it all the time! She, Ben and I had a couple fun games on her dirt court in the front yard. It was fascinating to watch a whole, unedited athletic match. The muscles on those women are so incredible. I miss being so athletic. It's hard to be when I can't keep in place long enough to join a team of any sort. Maybe I'll look into it when I get home in three weeks!!! I'm working on sorting out my things and consolidating everything so I can get home most efficiently. It's an exhilarating time and I am so grateful for my experiences! I could keep sharing the details for hours but I have to run to the cafe. Guess I'll just have to share the fun stories over tea in a few weeks! I have no idea what life will be like when I get back but I'm looking forward to a new start with a new perspective on life, though I know I'll be sad to say goodbye here! ~ Every new beginning is from some other beginnings end. ~
No comments:
Post a Comment